Last Time in the Avengerverse...
The narrator watches on helplessly as Vengy ventures through the portal. A crow appears like an omen, perched on the top of an electrical pole. It gazes at the portal as Vengy disappears through it. Then looks up at the narrator and seems to chuckle before it flies away.
The camera pans out, away from the desert and the slowly fading rift hovering over the lost highway of the Dark Man. It pans out so far, that it pans outside the television set. We can still see that world on the screen, as the camera slowly turns to face the narrator. He's tied up to his couch, eyes wide with terror. He mumbles something from behind the duct tape on his mouth. From behind the camera, we can hear a low chuckle.
Disembodied Voice: Why... I'm the new narrator, of course!
A dirty, accusing finger points at the narrator.
New Narrator: And you said, this would be the Avengerverse episode to end all Avengerverse episodes, didn't you? Poor Vengy... you're the angel in the lobby who put him in line. We've been waiting for him for a long... long, time.
The camera turns slowly, past the empty desert on the screen, and still turning, until the grinning face of Daedalus is centered. He giggles before speaking.
Daedalus: Enjoy the show.
He winks and bursts with laughter, dropping the camera to the floor of the farmhouse. The narrator watches in horror, upside down on our screen, before...
Static...
Click...
Horrorverse, Volume 1: Issue 1
The Keys to the Spider Kingdom
The Avenger walks slowly to what will inevitably be his death.
"Hey!" Vengy says, looking up over his shoulder in resentment. He's walking along a checkered floor in a fluorescent lit corridor that looks oddly familiar.
"I don't like his format. Change it," the narrator says simply.
The Avenger: Sure! Is this better?
The Narrator: Much better. Thank you.
Vengy stops walking, glancing around the corridor cautiously. He looks back up where he envisions the narrator to be.
The Avenger: Who are you? And where is the narrator?
The Narrator: I'm the new narrator. The old one is on vacation.
For a moment, Vengy questions this, but after giving it some careful thought, accepts it as a perfectly rational response.
The Avenger: Very well, then! Where to?
The Narrator: Why don't you try that door right there? To your right.
Vengy obliges, turning the knob and stepping into the other side. A woman is sitting on a bed, reading a bedtime story to her son. He cuts her off in the middle of reading.
The Boy: Mama, what's vacation mean?
Time seems to stop as Vengy straightens. The mother pauses, then turns her head to Vengy and grins. Her eyes glow with blinding light as her face begins to rot on its skull. When she speaks, it starts out as Sally Field's voice, but becomes distorted and distant, as if Vengy is underwater.
Sally Field: Vacation is where you go somewhere... and you never come back.
Her head tilts as her flesh melts, and a permanent grin fixes on her face. The son now turns his attention to Vengy, standing from the bed with metal braces on his legs. He starts to run after your favorite superhero and mine, but Vengy screams, backing away and slamming the door. The boy audibly runs into it on the other side. The Avenger falls on his butt and he suddenly realizes... he doesn't like this new narrator.
The Narrator: And why is that, Vengy?
The Avenger: You... well, you're kind of mean. Listen...
He stands and brushes himself off, his feeble little mind not quite grasping the predicament he's currently in.
The Avenger: I'm going to ignore that. Can you tell me where I am?
The Narrator: I can. You're currently in the Corridor of Purgatory. Don't worry, you're not dead... yet. This purgatory isn't between life and death. It's between universes.
The Avenger: Oh! I've been in those before, no problem.
The Narrator: Not like this. Now, stop talking to me. No more hints. Fulfill your narrator's prophecy.
Vengy obliges, hesitantly, then turns to the task at hand. Fulfill your narrator's prophecy. He wonders if he succeeds, he'll get his old narrator back.
He opens a door on the left side of the corridor now, and steps inside, clinching his teeth. He finds himself inside a waiting room. To the right, on a teal sofa, sits Konrad Raab, with his own foot lodged deep inside his mouth all the way down his throat. Eden Morgan sits next to him, somehow, her eyes bloodshot and her skin yellow. Vengy can see her veins, black and poisoned, popping out against their yellow canvas. To the left, Roxy Cotton stands, a large pink... we'll see banana, to protect Vengy's virgin ears... sticking out of her ass. Vengy's cheeks flush.
The Avenger: I know what that is, Narrator. Poor Roxy.
The Narrator: She had it coming... get it??
Vengy ignores the narrator, or tries to. He almost retches all over the waiting room floor. Sitting on the couch next to Roxy is Donovan Hastings, who seems perfectly fine.
The Avenger: What's your story?
Donovan Hastings: Oh! Nothing, I'm just visiting.
Hastings holds up a document as proof of visiting:
Visitor, Donovan Hastings, visiting: Travis Pierce's career
Next to Donovan, Phrixus Deimos chuckles, the spade of a shovel shoved into his throat. The handle sticks out as if someone had misplaced Pinocchio's nose.
The Avenger: Hey! Nice imagery!
The Narrator: Thanks!
And next to Deimos sits Kyra Johnson.
The Avenger: Just visiting?
Kyra Johnson: No, actually...
She reveals a skeleton key, as if that explains everything. The Avenger's eyebrows raise with curiosity. And sudden realization. Believe it or not. He feels that he must get that key. And he's right. Kyra feels it, too. She stands, as natural as possible, and walks up to the receptionist's desk. The window slides open and Tempest and Seb glare up at her from the other side of the desk. It looks as if they've been melted together by fire, as the two try to work as one. They fail miserably, their appendages moving almost randomly in every direction. From behind her, Vengy speaks up.
The Avenger: Wait... is this the Negative Universe?
Everyone in the waiting room stops what they're doing and turn to look at him, including Kyra. Tempest and Seb laugh simultaneously, producing a terrifying combination of their separate vocal cords working together, or fighting against each other.
Tempest/Seb: Of course. Our universe is always the Negative Universe.
The Avenger: Wait... yours? As in, Tempest and Seb? Or the Astro Creeps?
Tempest/Seb: Seb is an Astro Creep, you fool! Don't you see that? It doesn't matter how much he denies it, he's one of us! And let me tell you, if I knew then, what I know now, I wouldn't have had my little accident.
The waiting room chuckles as Tempest/Seb show Vengy where their skin has been welded together by the fire that consumes them. There's only one thought that's come to mind in all of this for Vengy.
The Avenger: Sam!
He turns quickly to go find him outside the corridor, but the new narrator stands in front of him instead, arms folded across his pinstripe suit.
Daedalus: Ah-ah-ah!
He wags a finger in front of Vengy's face with a grin.
Daedalus: The key, Mr. Avenger. Then you can have Sam.
Vengy's disdain is obvious as he glares as the narrator.
The Avenger: I should have known this universe was what it is.
The narrator chuckles.
Daedalus: Oh, Vengy. You have no idea what this universe is. But you will.
He winks and points as a brick wall opens up, an impossible green light blinding the Avenger as he shades his eyes with his hand. He can see Kyra rushing to the other side of the wall and Vengy chases after her.
On the other side, he finds himself suddenly jolted backwards as he tries to run. For a moment, he runs in place, before an invisible force shoves him backwards into a seat. He looks around groggily as the sounds seem distorted and far away. He thinks he hears what could be a gunshot. His vision is blurry, but he can see many other people surrounding him. He looks forward and can see a man standing in front of everyone else. As his vision begins to clear up, he realizes he's on an airplane. And the man standing in front of everyone else is the Virus, in a bright orange jumpsuit. Vengy, among the rest of his peers sitting down, are in blue jumpsuits.
Virus: Ladies and gentlemen! This is your captain speaking. I have the only gun on board. Welcome to CreepAir.
He smirks behind his mask. Some of the other inmates whoop and cheer. Vengy starts to get up in rebellion, but the Virus points his gun at him.
Virus: If you try to stop me, Vengy, the next wings you'll see will belong to the flies buzzing over your rotting corpse.
Meanwhile, another convict is walking up the aisle arrogantly. Vengy watches carefully as he yanks something out of someone else's hand.
The Avenger: Tony Savage?
The person he took it from turns and Vengy sees that it's Kyra.
Kyra Johnson: Hey, that's my key!
Tony Savage: Mine now, sista.
Vengy watches wide-eyed as Savage continues walking up the aisle, past Vengy, and out the exit, as if there wasn't a 30,000 foot drop on the other side. But he doesn't fall. He just... disappears. Vengy looks back at the Virus, who stands, frozen. In fact, everyone seems frozen, like mannequins. The Avenger jumps to his feet and chases after Tony. He hesitates at the door and takes one more look at the Virus. Still frozen. Then, he steps out the exit. He expects to be falling, despite what happened to Tony. So when he doesn't, he falls anyway.
Onto the floor of a bedroom. A considerably large bedroom. In fact, as Avenger looks around him, he realizes that he's in the bedroom of a giant. And he is about the size of a toy. Perhaps... an action figure?
Vengy, startled, looks up at the cloud pattern wallpaper. The floor below him is wooden, and as he looks down at the floor, notices something strange about himself. His boots seem... digital. As do his legs. He holds out his hands and those seem digital, as well.
Johnny Potatohead: Psst!
Avenger turns to see Johnny Potatohead pointing up at the giant computer desk above. The Pixar version of Tony Savage, complete in a green, purple, and white spaceman suit, looks to be working on his spaceship. Vengy concludes that he's trying to repair it and escape with the key!
Vengy rushes to the desk and climbs up the shelves, leveraging himself on the CD-Rom games and strategy guides. As he climbs to the top, he looks up at the gaming computer, complete with a Level Up logo centered at the top. Seeing Savage rummaging through a pencil holder, Vengy marches forward to confront him. He is, however, halted, when another action figure motions for him to stop. It's Mothman Cervantes.
Avenger detours over to Cervantes, who hunkers behind one of those lamps that you can spin on its axis, depending on where you need its light to shine.
The Avenger: Say, shouldn't you be next door? At Sid's house?
Mothman: Shh, that's not important. Actually, it is. I need you to help me, and in return... I'll help you. I need you to get Tony's attention, see. He's just out of reach of this lamp. We want Savage next door with us... you know, the Creeps. Tempest is waiting in the shrubs down below. If you could lure him closer, I could then knock him out the window and you can have your key to please your new god.
Mothman Cervantes nods towards the gigantic key leaning against Tony's spaceship.
The Avenger: Aw, shucks, Mothman. Tony just wants to be on his way. He doesn't want to hurt anybody. In fact, I'm sure if I just asked him, he would hand the key over without a fight. He just wants to go home.
Mothman: Are you that naive that you trust that theory? Savage is a fighter, despite what that goofy spacesuit might say otherwise. Just help me out, I don't think you want your god to be unhappy. He favors the likes of me, you know.
The Avenger: He's not my god, he's just my new narrator.
But he sulks over to the open window anyway and obeys.
The Avenger: Psst... Savage. Hey, Savage! I've got the part you're looking for over here.
Surprised, Tony turns and begins walking towards Avenger. Mothman doesn't hesitate. He hits the head of the lamp like a tetherball, and it spins around, colliding with Tony Savage and knocking him out the window. Mothman shrieks gleefully as he sprints to the key and snatches it. Avenger, offended, glares at Mothman as he spins around with a grin.
The Avenger: You betrayed me...
Mothman: You foolish masked man. Don't you understand? The Spider King and the Mothman holding the key is equally beneficial. You've fulfilled your destiny, for once.
Mothman takes the time to admire the key as Avenger watches him skeptically.
The Avenger: Okay. So... Then, where's Sam?
At first, Mothman pauses, looking from his key to Vengy. Then, he smiles and slowly points next door to Sid's house.
The Avenger: If I go over there for Sam... The Spider King is going to expect a key in exchange. I haven't come this far to be denied my friend. You're either coming with me, or I'm taking the key from you. But Tempest is getting that key.
The Mothman's cheer fades and his eyes narrow. Sighing, he sets the key down and faces the Avenger, preparing for the inevitable confrontation. On the other side of the desk, the Avenger does the same.
To Be Continued...
...Static
...Click
